Saturday, August 15, 2009

How A Three Year Old Can Reduce Me To A Stammering Fool.

I consider myself a fairly intelligent person. Heck, by the standards I see when I shop at Walmart, I am a freaking genius. So how is it that a three year old girl, who last summer was still peeing in her pants and flinging food at the dinner table can one-up me in a conversation about 90% of the time? What starts as a conversation about why the sky is blue can turn into a discussion on the inner workings of a manufacturing plant in a matter of minutes.

"Mom, why is the sky blue?"
"Because it reflects the water or something like that."
"Mom, why is water blue?"
"Because it reflects the sky, er, yeah."
"That doesn't make sense. Why?"
"Because water molecules evaporate and float up into the sky and clouds and, um, reflection."
"What's reflection?"
"When something looks like something else in something else, kind of like a mirror."
"But why?"
"Because light bounces off of a hard surface and we see it as the same thing."
"Did God make mirrors?"
"Well, God made the stuff that mirrors are made out of and then people actually make the mirrors."
"But HOW does a person make a mirror? I want to make one."
"Well, mirrors are made in a factory with lots of machines to help make them."
"I thought you said PEOPLE make mirrors."
"Well, yes, but they use machines to help them."
"Because there is no possible way for a human being to just MAKE a mirror without a machine helping them to do it."
"Because people are not strong enough to make all of those mirrors by themselves and they need help."
"Oh. Okay. Mom? What's a factory?"

Head explodes all over the kitchen table.

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